Can Change Happen in an Instant?
Q: How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Just one…but it’s very expensive, it takes a long time, and the light ,bulb has to want to change.
You’ve probably heard that joke. But there is some truth to it. The basic belief we must have if we’re going to create change quickly is that we can change now.
Then, we have to believe that we’re responsible for our own change, not anyone else.
Thirdly, we have to believe that “I can change it”.
Each time we experience a significant amount of pain or pleasure, our brains search for the cause and record it in our nervous systems to enable us to make better decision. Your brain looks for something that appears to be unique, for something that appears to be happening simultaneously and it looks for consistency. To change a behavior you need to follow six steps.
Decide what you really want and what’s preventing your from having it now.
Associate pain to not changing now and pleasure to the experience of changing now.
Interrupt the limiting pattern. We can be highly motivated to change, but if we keep doing the same things, our lives are not going to change.
Create a new, empowering alternative. You must come up with a new way, or several new ways, to replace whatever benefits you used to get from the old behavior.
Rehearse the new pattern again and again until it is consistent.
Test it! Do this by: a. making certain pain is fully associated with the old pattern b. making certain that pleasure is fully associated with the new pattern. c. make sure the new behavior is consistent with the values, beliefs, and rules of your life. d. see if the new pattern allows you to get benefits that you used to get from the old pattern. e. imagine yourself behaving in this new way in the future.
